Guess his shot at reinstatement went up in smoke.

Also with a young stud on her hands? Catherine the Great

Trump would have these kids fired, but that presupposes they’ll get jobs sometime soon.

The interpreter goofed. When asked about Comey’s termination, Putin actually said, “Your question looks very funny for me,” . . .“You see I am going to play hockey, and Trump is going to skate.”

I, for one, will eat a healthy serving of shit as long as it is served BBQ-style on the most patriotic of red, white and blue paper plates.

“banged one in with his off-hand”...

And he always gets his shot off in under 30 seconds.

Yeah, but according to the shark, it was over freaky fast.

As a Giants fan, my favorite memory of Ryan Howard was seeing him watch strike three sail past with the bat on his shoulder to end the 2010 NLCS. I’m not sure he ever hit another baseball again.

Said McElwain, “I can prove it’s not me, because I only fuck gators.”

Dunder-headed Deputy Given Opportunity To Spend Less Time In The Office After Illegally Stopping Michael Scott.

Good thing horse races are often won by the nose.

Tom, I’d tell you to lay off ESPN, but they’ve had enough layoffs recently.

Schilling’s version of a rally cap?

John Skipper gives away collegiate conference networks like Oprah gives away cars.

On the one hand, I can’t stand Trump, and I’m fully willing to believe that Reince Priebus is sports illiterate, but it’s possible that he said “put” not “punt,” which would kind of make sense. On the other hand, fuck them all in their stupid faces. 

I’m sure he’ll connect with his viewers in ways he was never able to do with his receivers.

He should have known better. History shows that the only droning allowed at the NFL draft is by Chris Berman.

I hear he also took RGIII, Goff, and Osweiler hunting last year, which explains all those wounded ducks.

He was shot in the leg while protecting kids. So, kick save Roy?!