Are you looking for a Drum and cymbal play out for that one?

The NHL was also considering a lifetime ban since Gary Bettman doesn’t like being upstaged by another bottom-feeder.

The jokes on Votto. That Indians fan was never thin.

The friction goes all the way back to the beginning, when Mike thought his name should be first.

If someone asks you a question — any question — that begins with “Who won the,” your wild-ass guess should never be “North Korea.”

You’re going to get a lot of well-deserved shit for this comment. But I’m going to stay positive and just congratulate you for restraining yourself by not using a racial slur!

“We clapped for Adam Jones AND Isiah Thomas last night! CHECKMATE, LIBTARDS.”

You’re actually an idiot.

Hell yeah they did.

I look forward to the Red Sox reacting to this in a very level-headed way.

I have it on good authority that the Caps game plan called for them to create a situation where Hornqvist would miss an attempt to hit Eller and instead break Sheary’s face. Because they’re just that diabolical.

“Hey there. Name’s Max. Max Rich, I should say. It’s a name and a way of life, my friend. Say, where do you summer?”

All three of these guys could have been the villain in an 80's skiing movie. 

Their team hashtag (#BearWithUs) doesn’t inspire confidence

It was the most NFL players that have ever attended a White House visit EVER!

Hernandez learned everything he knew about the Bible from Tim Tebow, which explains why his understanding of it was incomplete.

I assume he wears a full NBA uniform to go shoot hoops in the driveway too.

Poor kid, no father to prevent him from becoming a full-kit wanker.

As a Caps fan, I wasn’t even driven to drink last night. The whiskey was there. I just took my dog for a walk instead.