Except Alex Smith, he is terrible in both games.

I want the Pro Bowl to look like this. I’m not even joking.

Has anyone checked Tom Brady’s phone out to make sure he wasn’t in on it?

I’m not saying he is, but I’ve never seen both in the same room.

. . . or a guy who routinely takes pleasure in seeing Mexicans get carded.

No surprise coming from someone who’s always asking his teammates to build a wall.

For those unfamiliar with Mike & Mike’s show:

Mom: Okay Derrick, make sure you’re washed up before dinner.

I swear you guys rip on me thirteen or fourteen more times, and I’m out of here.

Yeah, but ask Dabo about other prophylactics and see how he responds.

Or you’re at Arby’s

Robert Kraft approves.

Chris Berman: [flashes wallet]

Overloaded leather is also his online dating profile name.

Sitting on that has got to hurt your BACK BACK BACK.

Hopefully he does not want to take a guitar lesson any time soon.

the unpopped popcorn things

I am definitely putting a hand towel in a sex robot’s butthole.

It’s a process very similar to the email of the week.

Also, Prescott would not have been playing behind one of the best O-Lines in football and handing the ball off to the rookie of the year (also related to that Offensive line) in San Francisco.