Oh, no. You called the most important people in my life BASIC! Oh, the insult! I rue the day I gave them jewelry they like and have sentimentality towards!

Haha yes I did. Took about a month and a half.

Solange a la Cranes in the Sky

BITCH DID YOU CROCHET AN ENTIRE GIANT POPCORN COSTUME?!?!?!?!?!?

My dog Moose, as Pamplemousse La Croix

Kiki’s Delivery Service is open for business!

I think it makes sense. Of course she identifies with an educator who puts her students in danger and doesn’t actually teach them all that much.

They weren’t Abel to make it work.

Well, I guess her Weeknd’s free...

I don’t get my news from a gossip site. I get my damn gossip from a gossip site and my news from a very expensive newspaper that is delivered daily to my doorstep.

This. As someone who is currently serving, I think it is important that people realize that the military is disproportionately made up of poor people, people of color, immigrants (including DACA recipients) and yes, LGBT people (like me!). There are numerous worthwhile discussions to be had about the size, cost, and…

Who are you hanging out with then? I have oral herpes and have had it since I was a child...I get outbreaks pretty much every time I get sick or if my lips get too dry and I don’t have the self-control to stop myself from picking at them.

1. She contracted oral herpes

To paraphrase a guy in the HuffPo comments section, “I’ve been very very gay. I’ve been very very drunk. Neither has ever resulted in me making a move on a 14 year-old.”

HOW CAN THEY DO THIS WHEN HILLARY, A WOMAN WHO RAN A CHILD SLAVE AND PROSTIUTION RING OUT OF A PIZZA PARLOR THAT SMUGGLED URANIUM INTO RUSSIA VIA BENGHAZI WHILE ORDERING HITS ON VINCE FOSTER AND SETH RICH AND BRAGGING ABOUT IT ALL ON 33,000 DELETED E-MAILS, STILL WALKS AROUND FREE!!!!!!!!!

I think it’s much more likely he will be encouraged to flip for a more lenient sentence, so we can get at some bigger, juicier, oranger fish.

Okay but sometimes there is one or two really small, extra toasty brown pops at the bottom of the box and they’re absolutely delicious and yes I do live in a state where marijuana is legal, why do you ask?

“The rules of hair care are simple and finite. Any Cosmo girl would have known.”