Somehow, Brent Barry is to blame.

UNC student-athletes will be thrilled once someone reads this story to them.

I’d watch what I say about Barkley. You know what he’s capable of...

At least we know the Adidas employees will look good in stripes.

A.C. Green, meanwhile, is fine with it.

Dolphins and Buccaneers both excel in water. Let them play

Understandable. It is just like when they pulled Hannah Storm from announcing New Orleans Saints games in 2005.

I know they don’t get to run it often, but only the Browns would have to practice the damn victory formation.

He’ll never throw another pass in the NFL if I have anything to say about it!

That’s a really nice gesture, and something he can be way more proud of than his Marlins 2003 ring.

“Is Emma Stone not available?”

I’m really bored at work

“I want to exchange your bullets for bullet points. Bullet points of knowledge.”

His finishing move is “The Safe Space” in which he runs his opponent over from inside his Prius.

“Whatever, that’s not even my favorite World Series,” he said, printing out a boarding pass to Williamsport.

Never thought Aroldis Chapman had such an impact on the team last year, but there you go...

Tonsil Hockey at that

You’re a fucking bum who’s been given the world.

Did they say anything about why they think it makes sense for universities to be running professional-level minor-league sports operations to begin with?