Shut up! It makes great brown rice in 25 fucking minutes! It’s the goddamn Holy Grail as far as I’m concerned.

One of the guys I play games with is in his teens and he was having fits in the chat when this stream went live. I didn’t believe these turds had actual fans until I heard this kid carry on.

Salty, I was raised by people who shielded me from everything and was allowed to play with my Gameboy at restaurants as a child. I learned nothing about food, social interactions or proper etiquette, but somehow have managed to procure a mate, family and enough money to dine out. Please rectify the past 25 years of my…

If one cannot be a grownup and ask for another table one could consider  busting a cap in the loudmouth’s fucking head.

Caputo 00 or GTFO

Before you self-diagnose, remember that most grocery stores are miserable to start with and the “nicer” ones are filled with smug assholes being shitheads.

All the folks I know in the UK who would benefit from this already shop online and get home delivery from Morrisson’s. “Go to the shops? Are you mad?”

in an oppositional relationship.

Fake letter or terrible management?

Give yourself 5 more minutes and use the toaster oven.

If chickpea water is aqua faba, is hot dog water aqua armour?

“People have been cooking and eating for thousands of years, so if you are the very first to have thought of adding lime juice to scalloped potatoes try to understand there must be a reason for this “ Fran Lebowitz

I have the ingredients for the Pad Thai in my office. Draw whatever conclusions you like. 

Who sits through this more than once without saying something about it? Salty, your letter writers are a mess.

You still get paper bills? Savage.

Kiddie Pool!

There’s a group that makes and distributes lunches for kids where I live because if the kids aren’t in school they may or may not get a lunch for two months. But look, an idiot is consuming wasting 72 hot dogs! Are we not entertained?

It’s  an affront to decency that this sort of thing is allowed to continue. In a country where we’re told that families shouldn’t be receiving SNAP because it encourages them to be dependent on the State, seeing this horrible garbage person stuff his maw makes me stabby. 

Preach!

Well Suzanne, thats a fascinating look into your psyche, but can we talk about what made you Mickey Rourke your face?