Dear Martians,

So...a married woman had negative things to say about women who slept with her husband and who were being used as political pawns against him 20 years ago? Sounds normal and natural. I don’t see women who he slept with as victims, and I don’t know if he actually raped anyone. Only one woman has ever alleged that, and…

I just posted this on another article, but I’m gonna repeat it.

It’s oddly charming...

Not THIS is a ridiculous thing that I would be happy to show to anyone around the world and be like THIS IS AMERICA. I love this.

Dear USA,

Dear world,

We know for sure that Bill Clinton is a serial cheater. We also know for sure THAT HE IS NOT RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT.

But only one of them is running for President. Which seems like a fairly important distinction.

Those aren’t Cheeto crumbs on his lips.

Sorry, Texas, this makes Florida look endearing. If you want to look good, y’all better quit writing FDR out of textbooks and referring to slaves as “workers.”

Back when Giuliani was running his kids refused to endorse him or show up for him. His daughter is publicly working for Clinton. Kids can stand on their own principles.

Meh. She inserted herself in the narrative. You lie with dogs, you wake up with fleas. Hopefully this will be a learning experience.

Let me guess, this was in Florida?

Roger Stone has zero credibility, he is a documented liar. He appears regularly on Alex Jones’ show. He accused the Khans’ of being secret members of Al-Qaeda. I could go on and on, but it is exhausting. WHY THE FUCK IS THIS MAN BEING INTERVIEWED OR APPEARING ON PANELS?? Stop legitimising him. Stop giving him a…

The latter.

Jon Huntsman? His breath smells like Obama’s cock.

Please please Mark Cuban. I’ve never asked you for anything. This is all I want.