Kluwe could have subbed this one for him. I’m all for that.

oh my god i love you just for thinking of doing that...

Hear it from Vikings fans!

The Vikings’ most famous star of the past decade is an egotistical, overly-dramatic, “LOOK AT ME” screamer whose life seems to revolve around pretending like he cares about the harm suffered by society’s most vulnerable while all the while his true intentions are still being the center of attention and deflecting…

What might not suck: Ex-punters turned Deadspin contributors? I heard this Kluwe guy has better editorial judgment than 90% of the Gawker staff.

Oh man, I didn’t even notice this, but now it’s too funny not to at least leave a reference in.

Good. I’ve been kind of sad we haven’t had any major BCO memes since “it’s not free if you give it to me.”

Ugh. Tall drinks on trays are the worst. When I worked for a brief and ill-advised time at red lobster, those Fucking tall glasses would just flip themselves right off the tray. After a while, you learned to take it as a success if you saved the rest of the tray. Good for you for coming up with such a quick story :-)

Kudos to the wait staff for making this young man’s birthday great. My uncle has Williams Syndrome so btdt with him needing a little extra attention in a restaurant and nobody has ever gone above and beyond like this!

People who are this patient and understanding and game are so hard to be found, I’m so happy he had that amazing experience. Nah, don’t mind the water from my eyes I definitely just accidentally poked myself with my glasses... definitely not tears...

Of all the stuff I would’ve imagined Australia wouldn’t have, waffles would not have been high on the list.

OMG. Could you imagine opening a Roscoe’s Chicken n’ Waffles franchise out there? You would be wealthy in VERY short order.

I AM MOVING TO AUSTRALIA AND I AM OPENING A WAFFLE RESTAURANT AND THEN I WILL MAKE A SQUILLION DOLLARS.

An entire island nation of waffle virgins.

I just spent last week in Portland, with an unfortunate layover in Tillamook. Lots of great food in Portland; my breakfast in Tillamook? Not at all good. You’d think a place called “Pancake House” would have breakfast nailed down, but when the highlight of the entire meal is the toast, it’s time to rethink your short…

Permission to co-op the term “overburdened with intelligence” please?

I was working at a relatively new restaurant in Portland, Oregon. We specialized in sandwiches made with fancy, local, organic ingredients.

Leaving coworkers to die a fiery death........Check

All on a bus, of course.

We’d had a freak storm come through that day...