The ex loved them. And made me go to tribute band shows with him. There are many things I will forgive him for, but that is not one of them.

YES YES YES.

So what if that happens in some cases? It doesn’t matter. People can make their bodies happy together for whatever reason, as long as everyone consents. It’s no one’s business but their own.

Ain’t nothing wrong with that. What consenting adults do in private is their business.

It might be good. They can meet, marry, breed and populate their run-down compounds together and hopefully stay the hell away from normal people.

Whenever you read “according to unnamed sources” substitute “some shit someone made up”

I could not agree more. My gym mistreats their instructors, so it is a constant merry-go-round of new instructors, some of whom come straight from cardio dance classes and have never taught aqua before. They often have no idea what moves are effective in water.

I’m already there.

it’s really a molcajete, a mortar made of volcanic stone. They’re pretty heavy to tote around.

A nice way to start moving again is aqua aerobics. You’ll be in class with a bunch of fat older ladies, but the water makes it gentle on your joints and you get resistance from the water.

The ex-Mr. Mockingbird and I used to travel a great deal. He insisted on staying in hotels with gyms and would grow apoplectic if I neglected to tend to that detail.

My work pays for my gym membership. So it is free for me not to go.

Sorry, my resolution this year is to not eat food prepared by anyone who covers up their feces with their hands. I fervently hope I make it.

This day-old champagne is not doing it, so I’m going to run over to the mom n pop market/liquor store and grab a celebratory bottle of pinot noir. And maybe a bar of dark chocolate.

I love how she just sits down with her purse and hammers that shit out like a Sunday school teacher for the first half of the song. Then something shifts and she gets the Holy Spirit and just tears it up. And then you realize she wore a fine fur just for the wonderful showmanship of tossing off a fine fur in the…

Because a talent like Aretha’s is truly rare.

And if you thought Domino’s in the US was bad, Mexican Domino’s is that much worse.

Yeah, it’s more like “fetid steaming cesspool of fuckery.”

Barking slime mold Donald Trump

You can feed a Syrian refugee child for about 50 cents a day. They could have provided 200,000 days of food. Good thing they got a dog - which they could have gotten for free from Craigslist.