She is clearly the most interesting person in this story, so good jeorb.

Find the woman who bit Queen Bey on the face, because I would like to shake that woman’s hand.

It’s times like these I almost miss the endless Trump coverage. Almost.

important stuff, right here, important.

Trust funds man....

If you could only play commercial jingles while getting it on, what would be your go-to to create the sexiest vibes?

I’m sure you’re an otherwise wonderful human being, but this take makes you a goddamn monster and a war criminal.

goes even better with “Gary’s Got a Boner” from Let it Be by the Replacements

Yes. He was heavy on the Cool Whip and light on the Spam. He could make a can of Spam last a week. He also put Cool Whip on other, not-normal things, like hamburgers. He saved the empty Cool Whip containers, washed them out, and stored just about everything in them. There were dozens of Cool Whip containers in the…

My grandpa is 95 years old and still lives on his own, out in the middle of nowhere, Nebraska.

eating something solely because no one else likes it is the ultimate old man move.

More than happy to oblige:

I remember there were two choices at the cinema when I did decompression from Afghanistan; this and True Grit.

This is how it always is. The youngins’ are always lazy fucks until they do something substantial, in which case they’re naive and clueless and should go back to their textings and vidya’ games.

Anything by Robert Anton Wilson, really.

Or House of Leaves. Has anyone bought that up yet? Danielewski has gotten awfully obscure since then and I don’t have the patience but that was as rewarding as it’s reputation suggested.

No, it’s possible. Just harder than Ulysses.

Brace yourselves for some username/comment synergy but the Illuminatus Trilogy is good practice for reading Ulysess. Its pretty split between regular narrative fiction and  Joycian POV stuff.

stop objectifying yourself

Can we have you?

You are two things!