The Shout Factory app's got tons of them, too. Unfortunately, that's not one of them.

I ate one once. It was tolerable. But I felt like if I ate five of them I might die.

ARISE CHICKEN

I want to live to be a hundred. I just don't see it happening.

You're right. I just wanted to write that.

"Hey, Taco Bell, you know what you should sell? Hatchets."

No one needs to know Tity Boi's thoughts, on this or anything.

Yeah, I mean, I don't want to go to a Cubs game with him or anything, but off-putting is a bit harsh.

I still like Adore. But I've literally liked one song since then.

I drank beer in the shower once. I didn't get much out of it. But maybe I was doing it wrong.

Hear, hear!

Ricky been drinking, you think?

Beyond that ridiculously specious reasoning, where the fuck is it written that all women want to have babies, anyway? I know tons of women who have no interest in it.

Regardless of what Natalie Portman made, this article is sickening. Ashton Kutcher is overpaid if he's making scale.

Oh, okay. I honestly don't know anything about Frank Grillo; I was just saying that you don't need to be some sort of intellectual titan to work on Wall Street. (Which of course isn't to say that there aren't some intellectual titans working there; I mean, Jim Simons is terrifically intelligent.)

What the hell is going on here?

Hey, at least it's a writing job.

Same here. One of the many masterstrokes of that book is how far past the Event it's set, and how everything is dull and calcified and eroded as a result. I couldn't believe I'd never read a book like that before then. It seems such a basic (and overwhelming) concept.

Dude, I don't know why you don't tell everyone that story. In the annals of temping, that's legendary.

Yeah. I mean, if I wanted to be gauche, I could tell people I worked on Wall Street briefly (I did some contract IT work at a place down there a couple years ago.)