Would you prefer it masquerade as news like on some other channels?
twirlywhirly
twirlywhirly
If you or someone you know is struggling with domestic violence, call the national domestic abuse hotline at 1-800-799-3224
Statistically speaking, you’re far more likely to get murdered after you return to America.
“sometimes I take a poop in my hand and then eat it”
Jim Bob is asking Jesus for advice right now, and Jesus is all
Yeah, ok, but the thing about the coolant problems we’ve been having is that it really doesn’t seem like we can maintain the level of functionality and keep her at a frosty 60-70 degrees celsius. We tried air vent cooling, a water based solution, nothing. Greg, who is really developing as an out of the box thinker,…
I got one about the time my uncle was a dick to a celebrity! My uncle was doing computer shit in Olivier Sarkozy’s office. He noticed a picture in Sarkozy’s office and told him his daughter looked like one of the Olsen twins.
I used to work for the tabloids, so it’s not a question of if I have a story, but which one I tell the Jezzies.
There was the time Dave Navaro refused to be interviewed unless I gave him a blow-job. He had just married Carmen Electra.
There was the time on a red carpet that a very drunk Gary Busey asked me how, a…
So if you have a bunch of beans, and you spill them, they get everywhere and roll into all kinds of nooks and crannies and no matter how hard you try to clean them up you’re still finding them days later in unexpected places. Much like how if you tell a secret people will spread it around and it won’t be a secret…
Amy Schumer is really just the best.
Enjoy it while it lasts, kid. Being a smart kid is hell as an adult. People have so many expectations for you, so many goals, so many AP classes. You have so much promise as a young thing, so bright and clever, and suddenly you look around and you’re sitting in your pajamas, watching Netflix, doing nothing with your…
I bet Ariana Grande knows China is a country...maybe she’s the world’s smartest baby.
You know what else shouldn’t be tax exempt? Any church!