I’ve only found myself in one of those groups *once* but I think (hope) we did right by the staff. There were about 15-20 of us leaving a show and looking for a place with food and drink. We called a place that we already knew was closing in about 20 minutes (but there was nothing else around at all) and said “Hey we…

My husband always requests that I make “holiday guacamole” during festive-times (guac with pears, grapes, and pomegranate seeds on top, hence the green and red “holiday” theme). I still love a classic guac, but this one’s delicious.

Ooh, bonus for removable monograms. I’ve never been a fan of glassware with labels on them, especially the ones you get from wine tastings or other events.

We’re tabletop gamers, so we ordered custom dice that matched our wedding colors with our initials on them. Figured it was a decent favor because many of our guests were also gamers, and many of our guests also brought their kids.

Those almonds were at one of my cousin’s wedding, and I had to endure his drunken Italian father going ON and ON about their symbolism and how he loved them so much. So, I guess we know how giant bowls of them ended up on every table.

We had a lovely demure Shetland Sheepdog (aptly named Prince) for some time before we got the beagle, and boy did that guy have to adjust. Whereas Prince would graze his food all day, nibble a bit daintily here and there, this new puppy would inhale her food, run over to his bowl, push him out of the way, and then…

My beagle once got through about half of an oversized 1lb Hershey’s Kiss that my idiot boyfriend at the time left on the coffee table in easy reach of her insatiable gullet. I called the vet and they advised me to induce vomiting with hydrogen peroxide.

I had a beagle who was exactly like this. Once she figured out that the ground cover with ornamental strawberries were edible, we never saw the fruit again. If she ever got out of the yard, we knew we could just find her in the compost pile on the other side of the fence, digging away.

WORD.

I had quite a few friends say “But don’t you want the experience of going dress shopping? It’ll be fun! We’ll make a day of it!” It just came off as selfish, like “Hey I wanna have a lavish day of sipping champagne and giving cruel honest advice about your body!” Meanwhile I try on dress after dress that I will never…

I’d say so! The layers on the skirt are gorgeous.

Thanks!

Thanks! I got the idea of the red lining and the gold ribbon from two different blogs. It was nice being able to have the creative freedom to mix and match, and fortunately the dress pattern was pretty simple and forgiving (as opposed to something more form-fitting and with delicate fabrics). The lining is a simple…

I made mine from a simple pattern (with some alterations by a professional once I had the bulk of it done). It was pretty basic, the top never *quite* fit right (and had to be safety-pinned to my bra) but total cost me about $200 for fabric and $400 for alterations.

We also both have a horrible sense of smell so often farts go completely unnoticed. We are so fucking perfect for each other. =D

Another relevant one:

One of my favorite bits from Man Stroke Woman:

How do you make it silent? I barely even get a warning that one’s coming.

Neither my husband nor I have much control over when/where we fart, so if it happens then it just happens. He also tends to let out a little toot in the mornings when he’s just getting up.