Jesus, I know. Cream cheese does not belong in sushi. Christ.

"The McDonnells were first accused of wrongdoing when they fired a chef who they claimed had been stealing food from them. Unfortunately for them (and fortunately for Virginia), the chef had documents proving that Williams had paid for the McDonnells' daughter's wedding."

when i heard he adlibbed the 'i put your symptoms into the computer and it looks like you might have network connectivity problems' line from the flu ep, i was SOLD FOR LIFE on chris pratt.

yall go to mit and THAT is your frat homepage?

Why...would anyone assume that she doesn't exercise constantly? Yes, she's genetically blessed (as are all professional models and athletes) but one isn't going to remain toned like that without hard work. When your job requires that you be professionally good looking and your body looks exactly like what society…

I think it's a National SHAME that Alfonso Ribeiro isn't our generation's Regis Philbin.

I think it's as simple as "I'm allergic to many kinds of nuts, but not peanuts, which is weird, huh?" If I had a customer say something like that, we could've gotten a laugh out of it, because yeah, that IS unusual, but it definitely makes sense.

If it is important to you, maybe when he tells them not to put tree nuts into his dish, he could up front say "I am allergic to almonds, walnuts, and all tree nuts. Peanuts are fine." I find being a clear in your explanations as possible (as long as it doesn't take more than a couple of sentences) is the best for…

Height and weight, maybe. If you weighed more, would you get better projection off of the trampoline? This is starting to sound like physics, or math.

Yes it's OK to wear leather pants. Just not this way:

I am torn between appreciation that it's for a worthy cause and irrational hatred of all "performance art".

"Shiloh wore shorts and a top hat."

See, I've always loved Angelina. But that dress?

Am I nuts or is that dress a little circa '97 Delia's catalog in the bodice? Not that I'm complaining.

I can't get any fucking gifs to post so just picture a string of horrified looking cartoon rabbits.

THIS IS UNCOMFORTABLE AND ALSO HORRIBLE AND BAD.

The thing is, if I'm paying the calligrapher, they should be willing to write "you wanna done come on down to this here wedding", if that's what I told them to write, regardless of what's correct, grammatically. And if they aren't willing to do that, they should decline to do the work, not just send out invitations…

You are too brave, Hillary. Too brave.

So basically, a bunch of people who are a) looking for anything to ding the President on and b) have no idea what looks good. 'Cause that suit is niiiiice.