It's important to note that sorority functions can have alcohol (provided and dispensed by a 3rd party vendor - so that the responsibility to card is on them) at functions that they throw at other locations, such as bars, function halls, etc.

So, first of all, her speech was very sweet and well done. But also, did they start telling her to wrap it up at like 30 seconds? Damn! Critics Choice Awards run a tight ship!

Re: Jessica Biel - I hope I don't get completely flamed, but so far in my own pregnancy all I crave are fruits and veggies, which means I eat a TON of salad to satisfy cravings. You don't know! (The funny part is, I normally eat like an actual garbage person. I guess my fetus is going to be some sort of health nut.)

I think we can all agree that the biggest snub was The Lego Movie, no?

You guys, this feels like the perfect place to admit that I LOVE HILARY DUFF AND DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT.

I wasn't disagreeing with you. More elaborating on what you were saying. But now I kinda wish I had been disagreeing with you.

It is, but also brides shouldn't be dicks. Besides getting to and from the wedding and buying a dress (that I went out of my way to make sure was a relatively reasonable price, under $100), nothing was "required." Can't make it to the bridal shower? No bigs! You bought a dress! Can't attend the bachelorette party? Too…

Wedding parties end up being the FUCKING WORST and I sometimes regret ever having one because of the drama it caused. Between family butting in about people we had "unforgivably left out" to guests being audibly "confused" about why I had to bridesmen, something about wedding parties gives everyone the go-ahead to be…

Great article; fascinating story. Sadie gives it two enthusiastic paws up.

Ugh Cathy's always been so jealous of Maddie.

Giada is pretty much ground zero for why I don't trust skinny food experts.

I am firmly in the no kids camp, but even more firmly in the ALL OLD PEOPLE camp. Old people can be just as unpredictably as little kids, but they are less likely to cry and more likely to say hilarious shit.

We had a no children rule at our wedding, mainly instituted by me. If I was going to spend months planning the shindig to a T, I definitely wasn't going to let a crying kid interrupt / steal the show, especially during the ceremony.

I have a crush on Thomas and Michael.

Because if she had been there before and eaten "the bread rolls" as she said she did, she would have known that they weren't "bread rolls." Lady is a joke and deserves to be treated as such.

And now the whole evening was worth it. Thank you all for validating my love of juice. Even you, BurnerWhore.

This quote became the running joke in my group of friends after that night. To this day.

I think we've earned OceanSpray.

I usually don't get touchy about stuff online, but I think that deriving "careless, entitled imbecile" from my story or assuming that I don't have respect for "priceless works of art" is unwarranted. As I said previously, the event was in a hall that did not have displays. It's not that I don't care. There was just…

I think I love you.