And if I’m not ungreyed after I photoshopped an ibex for you people I just give the fuck up.

You signed a fucking petition wherein a person was called a cunt. You're either ignorant or stupid. Which would you prefer?

Reddit, a popular site for creepers and fans of upskirt shots and Gawker Media bloggers in need of content.

I think we've found Donald Trump's Kinja name, everybody.

Emma Stone.

The higher the bangs, the closer to God.

OK maybe it’s just because I’m a godless atheist and am just generally puzzled by declarations of faith, but I never know what to make of people who tell themselves and each other that God has forgiven them. First off, how do they know? Did they get something in the mail? Second, generally God isn’t the victim of…

Oh Jesus, no no no. JOHN DORIAN.

Yeah, a “100% pro-life voting record” doesn’t mean shit when you don’t uphold the same standards you force others to. Fuck off, you Dollar General version of Mr. Clean.

Good for you. Yup, young and stupid is an excuse many of us can use. If I had to add up all the things I put up with in my youth I would probably never leave the house out of sheer embarrassment.

yougotsentenced.com

My husband's excuse for not putting away the dishes out of the dishwasher: "I don't know where they go."

I bet the CIA totally shows episodes of this show to torture our foreign enemies.

I actually wasn't convinced on that one. I felt like the storyteller was reading a lot of malice into that kid's behavior that wasn't necessarily there. She set up the story by telling us about how bratty and entitled they were just because they were coming from a debate team event, without actually giving any…

It tastes like green. Which is lucky, because he's probably allergic to red.

Unfortunately these are those lovely type of guys who think the only women in the world who aren't whores are their mothers and sisters. They would gladly kill someone who said anything like this to their mothers, but only because they view women as possessions. This kind of stunt might temporarily shame them, but…

Agreed, agreed. Lilo and KK don't go around proclaiming to be feminist whilst presenting an unattainable standard of beauty to young women. To me, once Bey started exploiting feminism as a branding strategy, I lost respect.

Drake is not bored. He simply dropped his cell phone in Nicki's formidable bum-crevice and is wondering how to retrieve it.

"Someday my prince will cum."