Now we’re talking.

I wondered where “being hit by a bus” or a creative variation thereof would figure. I am disappoint.

Luck certainly only divulged his decision after there was no more lingering doubt about it, but after being on the receiving end of this temper tantrum coming from the stands, I’m sure he’s actually glad to be retiring. I wouldn’t want to keep playing and putting my health and sanity on the line for this bunch of…

You’re welcome, my good sir!

That girl looks positively pained to be there. 

He straight up looks like the mentally challenged henchman of a sugar cane plantation baron.

We finally know what’s the wonder bread equivalent of going all out for press conference lewks. All the commitment, color coordination, and panache of Cam Newton? No! Just a ratty t-shirt that looks like it's 15 years old and a hat that was bought at a truck rest stop in Florida. 

NoHo Hank is a triumph of writing and performance, and when he said “I’m optometrist at heart” I just about lost it. Such a perfect description, even in its weird specificity. They really know who this person is, and Carrigan knew exactly how to deliver the line.

True, which makes you wonder why all those trucks are trying to pass you by steamrolling you.

My most vivid memory of Houston is the sheer terror I felt driving around down there. 8 out of 10 vehicles are monster-like trucks and everyone drives like they’re out for blood - specifically YOURS. From what I read here, this is the Texans’ fanbase. Checks out.

I think you’ve been Kinja’d.

Awwwwww look at those sweet eyes and that vacant stare! 

All hail Titan. But I came here for a dog pic thread and fuck me, I’ll start one. Here’s Ben wondering how this stretching thing is done:

Came here to say just that.

I grew up in Brazil and I was in high school at the height of Paulo Coelho’s fame. My beloved writing and literature teachers could not stand this hack and were befuddled by his success. That alone put me off his books, and later interactions with intelligent people who bought into the hype, read one of his books, and…

My kids spent all day Friday asking me what time it was and counting down the minutes to see it. I expected they’d give Cheyenne Jackson more interesting things to do or sing, so I was disappointed in that. The weird dubbing/sound editing is also still there, but the plot was strikingly political! It was refreshing,…

I'm dying laughing here. This needs more stars.

Be excited! Traveling alone is always a blast, you get to do whatever whenever. I don’t do weed, so when I need to sleep I take 5 mg Melatonin and also a Zzzquil pill. That knocks me out pretty good, with no side effects the next morning. But of course, try beforehand to see how it affects you. I don’t really have any…

Awwww hello! It seems like it’s been ages since I mailed Catarina those baby outfits when I was in Brazil! :D So nice to know you guys are doing well! She seems so happy!

I’m so sorry this is the way your family treats you. I know what it’s like to want something basic as love and affection and get nothing like it in return. I also come from a fraught, difficult set of family relations, and after moving from South America to the US I can’t tell you that 1) that shit doesn’t go away but…