Yup. It’s all sunshine and rainbows until life comes at you HARD. When I was pregnant with my first, I read all the books on natural labor, adamant that I’d try to do the thing drug-free, my ob/gyn was 100% on board... Until we caught the baby’s heart rate slowing down in a very dangerous pattern right as I had my…

You’re describing all dogs, basically. I mean, all dogs except for this one:

This is not the content we deserve, but it’s certainly the content we need. My contribution is my pair of sunbathing, photobombing weirdos:

I’m not on Twitter and thus cannot find more empirical evidence, but it seems to me that random capitalization is a linguistic feature embraced by rich old white dudes with dementia/drug-ravaged brains. Someone should start a (extremely expensive and prohibitively exclusive) rehab retreat for their affliction, and…

Thank you so much for the tip! I'll be sure to look it up. And thanks for the motivation, the weird sources of weight fluctuations are very much real (my scale says so)! I'm trying to focus on the positive and the overall health reasons I'm going for this and just go LALALALA CAN'T HEAR YOOOOUUU to my scale right now.

I’m doing the whole MyFitnessPal/daily varied workouts/weekly weigh-ins/measurements/monthly progress pics shebang, and as much as I intellectually know the number on the scale doesn’t matter as much as other metrics, and women retain liquid over the course of the month, and sore muscles swell up etc etc etc, it’s…

Someone give Drew Brees a ride to Atlanta (if he's not there already) and put Goff out of his misery.

This is fantastic. Love the way they embraced the fail.

Let’s remember some failed high fives:

It’s heartwarming that he’s giving Americans a chance to finally unite in a resounding “FUCK NO”. 

Since Stone is in such financial hardship, I’m sure he can go to his local people - the local attorneys, you know, the ones in the neighborhood - and just have them do their work for free. He’ll pay them when he can, and it'll be fine. Because that’s what local people do for you when you have no money, right? Right?…

Trump has sold himself as one of these guys you’re describing, with the added value of (purported, probably fake) wealth and now power. To admit he’s a bumbling idiot who failed upwards despite his own crippling mediocrity would be opening themselves to the same sort of judgment.

Chicago should check whether there’s anything in the rulebook that forbids teams to stick pictures of women on the football prior to the kick.

Yeah, I was weirded out by the fact that no one acknowledged the alternative spelling Trump offered, but I kept listening. It was addressed but in a “this also happened” kind of way. C’mon, this is the best part of this whole episode! Is it multiple typos? Does he genuinely not know how to spell hamburger? Is his…

ME TOO! One of my first memories is my mom’s stove looking as tall as a fucking sheet of metal because the pressure cooker had blown up and shot beans all over the kitchen, destroying the stove and scraping the hell out of the ceiling. After I moved out of my parents’ house, I didn’t get a pressure cooker for a long…

ME TOO! One of my first memories is my mom’s stove looking as tall as a fucking sheet of metal because the pressure…

Imagine opiates instead of beer, and this is a good depiction of Irsay:

Duuuuuude, how come you guys don’t have an open thread for Christmas Eve?

I’ve read about this version and now I’m saving it for whenever I need a good, long ugly cry. The original version makes me cry, the YouTube video of the cast singing it at the White House during Obama’s last year in office makes me cry, so I can only imagine listening to this iteration will reduce me to a blubbering…

Wow, what a coincidence! I got my dog while I was living in Orlando. I’ve had her since 2015 and I’m having the same experience you are - I have always had big dogs, but as it turns out I love having a small dog, too.

At the shelter I was told she’s a long-haired Chihuahua mix. But she’s bigger than a Chihuahua, and she has a long torso and stumpy legs. I think she has some Corgi in there too.