Opened this article and immediately have "I'm in Luv With a Stripper" in my head. Fuck.

kim took it all. she took all the ass.

case in point...

I can't imagine wanting to hang out with Kathie Lee over Kelly Ripa...

I can hear the tears of teenage girls falling to the floor

uhhh... doesn't he realize that his coat is eating his hands?

i think you're mistaken. i think that house belongs to her lips. that's kyle jenner's lips house.

"Echelon" is my JAM when I'm getting ready...

This made my Friday.

I say they bring in Winona to play Marnie

Holy shit. I forgot about these chicks. I think the last time i saw them was on Leno.

this was me in junior high, no joke (and yes, Now and Then gave me the idea)

I am laughing out loud for realz.

Amen, Julie. That song blows.

Good Lord.

News like this should be shocking.

"all together everyone... 1, 2, 3 I LOVE BLOW!"

OMG FLOAM!

Everyones. But the Kardashians first. As an appetizer. Not too much brain in those noggins.