Officials wanted to punish him further but he plead “Sorry guys”, the ultimate Canadian legal defense. After that they were powerless but to return of verdict of “No, no, we’re sorry.”

Funny, Adrian Peterson’s son’s face is imprinted on his cleats too.

Half a bottle of scotch and the cat got a treat when Trump was speaking because his voice hurts her ears and she was anxious about the future of our country.

It occurs to me that they might be a better team if they didn’t spend all of their recruitment time on players named Army. Seems like a statistically small pool to draw from.

I’ve heard that he cannot palm a golf ball.

One pun only, Vasily.

It’s actually a professional term. Doctor’s are doctor’s; chefs are chefs; presidents are presidents; coaches are failures in the booth; officers are officers... etc.

More cupholders.

Saw a mermaid once. I saw the woman half sticking out of the water, waving her hands frantically towards me, so I waved back, just to be friendly, I’ve never met a mermaid before, so what do you even say?? Then she disappeared under the water and must have swam back to her mercity. Pretty neat little day at the beach.

What a kerfuffle! Christopher Reeve probably has someone helping him turn over in his grave...

“Worst quarterback in the NFL,” [Michael] says.

“fibre” Canadian or typo?

You know, what if her kids are assholes? Maybe they had it coming.

They say his right foot is made of lead.

I guess you could say she knows FA about anthem singing!