I drink heavy cream and eat pure gluten just to spite people. MWAHAHAHAHA!

"Hurry! We must save all the romance novels being sold in this overpriced gift shop!" yelled the cashier as the zombies encroached. He pushed the book cart faster, but they were still gaining.

Yeah, after my wisdom teeth were removed, I was crying and begging my mom to steal surgical gloves for me.... Ya get weird. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

DON'T JUDGE KOTTBULLAR!

YOU ARE RIGHT IKEA I NEED PUPPIES TO MATCH MY NEW SULTAN HAVBERG WITH BEKKESTUA. I WILL NAME THE PUPPY KOTTBULLAR IN YOUR HONOR.

Unless they start doing Adventure Time marathons, they really have no idea how to cater to millennial women.

Ha HA! Mine was a combination of several of these and a cool wedding all at once!

I KNOW THE ANSWER!!!

AW YISS, THIS STORY WAS GROSS AND I ENJOYED IT.

Don't you mean, EYE have no sympathy?!

NOT ALL ORIENTALS.

I don't know what you're talking about. I ask reality TV execs to make all my major decisions for me.

Hmm, do I accept the apology?

OMFGIMSOGLADTHANKYOU

I thought that too, but then my husband said, "I think she might just like sucking cock. I don't think she cared about the drink." And I went...

...did... did the rabbit live?

As a member of everyone, I think you should stop. I'm starting to get embarrassed for you.