We’re gonna have a house shaped like a unicorn and have five little girls named Etni, Carousel, Sequin, Abercrombie and Phantom! And we’re gonna have a dog named Ruffalo and the dog is gonna have a cat named Myriad.

Oh! No. It’s because I don’t particularly like the women I work with. :( They’re all very dumb and bad.

Listen, we only have the best traitors. Benedict Arnold was a nobody compared to the traitors we have on my staff and transition team. It’s gonna be the biggest betrayal ever. You’ll see.

My favorite thing about this election is that the same people who always bitched that Obama was soft on Putin are now enthusiastically supporting a guy who is openly sucking his dick. Excuse my language.

oh…

When this video and story first started popping up a few days ago I read a blog showing that her mother is a pill-popping shitbrain who basically forced the poor girl and her younger siblings into spending time with the step father that abused her. The poor girl also slept on a dirty mattress in a basement next to a…

National Suicide Hotline: 1-800-273-8255

Anthony Weiner not being dead in a ditch or renditioned to a black site in Yemen is proof that Hillary ain’t killed nobody.

Fuuuuck that hurts. Ugh. I mean, the privilege of being bored.... Just. This can’t be real right? I find this totally unbelievable. If you’re bored then maybe go skydiving or buy a motorcycle or travel or do literally anything besides vote to fuck over the country.

See I’m hoping they’re 102 so they don’t live to vote next time.

in a vote of 368 to 1

Some studies have suggested that when given the choice to receive electric shocks or be left alone to their thoughts, people tend to choose electric shocks. It’s a terrifying facet of human psychology.

If by “boring” he means “a continuation of America’s position as a (mostly) respected global power and ally to many nations” and “relative US economic stability” then yes, he’s correct, the last 8 years were quite boring. I hope he’s prepared to be teetering on the brink of diaster for the next four years at a bare…

It’s so upsetting. A family member of mine voted for Trump because “the last 8 years were boring” and all I can think today is how right he was. The last 8 years were gloriously, perfectly boring. I’ll take boring any day over this actual shit show (or maybe more fitting- piss show).

Sadly, the pee stuff is what is going to get people to pay attention. Aside from being the least important, it is also the most suspect / unverifiable thing in that dossier (outside of the FSB producing the tape which seems impossible).

So, he tells his people to be wary of hidden, tiny cameras because you don’t want to end up on the evening news.

“Nobody’s ever had crowds like Trump has had,”

I love how Trump said foreign countries would respect us more than under the Obama administration yet in China right now:

This is such a stark contrast to Obama’s farewell speech last night (and the last 8 years for that matter, but last night brought it home in a very heartbreaking way) that it makes me tear up. I can’t believe this shitshow on wheels is what follows such a smart, savvy, dedicated, funny, self-depracating, diplomatic…