I told my sister if you really are going to secede, try to give me some warning because I want to move there first. Fuck this idiot country.

Maybe I’m too young to remember, but did Sea World lose its shit when Free Willy came out?

The gingerbread man sits inside his gingerbread house. Is he made of house, he wonders, or is the house made of him?

Bobby, I think the headline should be, Is Bradley Cooper’s ‘Girlfriend’ Pregnant?

Nicki Minaj’s ex-boyfriend.

Serious journalist=must be ugly. Got it.

Really hoping a woc makes it far enough that she’ll be the next bachelorette.

It breaks my heart that some of the same people who voted for Obama voted for Trump. Like, a theoretical Black president was fine, but after 8 years of the reality, along with him not being able to blow rainbows and diamonds out of his ass, coupled with subconscious panic over the future of a white minority,…

ehhhh, Connor Kennedy by all accounts was actually defending a gay friend, and from a quick google was previously arrested protesting the Keystone XL pipeline. He went to the DAPL protest with his dad too. As repeatedly arrested rich spawn go, seems like he’s good folk. Can’t work up any snark over him.

Voting without any knowledge or details of what you are voting for is the American Way.

I know. I wish it had been more obvious during the election, though.

She’s not dead? I didn’t know she was alive until now.

I think he might not be totally trustworthy. I mean, I don’t know, but I’m starting to get a shifty feeling from him. Could just be me, though.

I’m starting to think this guy might be a narcissistic piece of shit.

This makes me want to hurt random people.

Came here looking for this comment. I swear I am a thoughtful, sensitive human being.

I see what you’re doing. Trying not be be low brow. You plucky devil you.

This is a serious story, no unibrow jokes.