The ninth letter of the alphabet is I, and the eleventh letter is K.

I believe that Melania’s hood was bedazzled and Ivanka’s was a knockoff from a small time designer on Etsy.

I’m really enjoying the show. Darius is the right mixture of odd duck and curiously smart. Hope they stick to that balance.

23 body sculpting tips that will have your dad drooling.

Maybe if the reporters used flash cards of a marshmallow, a child or dog that would help jog his memory.

That’s weird. I didn’t know people could be reincarnated before they died. And, yet, here Phyllis Schlafly still lives among us.

Hildabeast Clinton and the Vagenda of Manocide is probably my least favourite JK Rowling book.

How many dates does one go on with Elon Musk before he takes you home to meet his mothership?

If you want to fuck virgins in paradise, blow yourself up like a normal person.

A real dickhead....I’ll see myself out.

All I can see when I look at him is a penis! And not a good looking penis. One you kind of want to say, “on second thought, maybe we shouldn’t” to.

Only one. I dated this nerd to make him look cool because I really needed the money to replace the white suede outfit I had borrowed without my mom’s permission.

Even if he was an affirmative action admission all it would prove is that affirmative action kicks ass and is worth the investment, because we got Barack Freaking Obama out of it.

I know I shouldn’t give Scott a pass but he reminds me of one of my boyfriends from high school — a totally charming cokehead with too much money and absolutely no sense of personal responsibility.

To be fair, wrapping an American flag over a woman's head and smothering her is a conservative mating ritual. These dudes were just trying to get some cutty!

Kim and Kanye take Taylor Swift

I also increasingly feel for her, and definitely felt bad for her tonight. When she married Trump, I think she signed up for a pretty ordinary trophy-wife type marriage. She probably thought he was kind of eccentric, but what silver-spoon tycoon isn’t?

i love and respect you but you’re on the wrong side of history here.

Too much pressure to excel.

Unfortunately it’s an unavoidable byproduct of this story.