It was Jazz, he said she looked different ever since nicky was born. I know an embarrassing amount of Fresh Prince as well as The Nanny details.

Also, if Trump does not have a case of backpfeifengesicht*, I don’t know who does.

He means the tyrant on William’s arms.

When the Queen dies, it means he-who-shall-not-be-named is one step closer to the throne. God help us all.

I assumed they were related to Rock Lords?

I’ve been looking for a garter belt that’s actually functional rather than decorative for ages. Those kinds of stockings are so much more comfortable than control-top whatevers, you can clip some thigh-high socks up there when it’s cold out, so much easier to pee, just superior all around. Not that anybody wears…

They are called garters and they’re not as popular as they used to be, but they’ve got multiple niche audiences. I wore them when I worked 9-5 in an office because pantyhose all day was just not happening. Thigh highs with a garter belt is way easier to deal with when going to the bathroom and they aren’t as hot and…

Cats: Marc Meron (amusing, introspective, cantankerous)

Hot tip: don’t try to convince your SO to have period sex by saying “But you get to pretend you’re washing off the blood of your enemies when you take a shower!” I (drunkenly) thought that was hilarious. He did not.

My favorite anecdote from a friend at the DC March: “My husband pointed out about halfway through the march that he hadn’t yet seen a misspelled sign. I watched carefully after that, and he was right — thousands of signs, not a single misspelling.”

She’s in for a tough road, but make no mistake, she can handle it just like she’s handled all the difficulties of her life. Remember, she was raised on the South Side of Chicago by a father who was a blue-collar worker and a mother who stayed at home with her brother and her. She watched as her dad, who was her rock,…

Oh my god that Pablo is fantastic.

Counterpoint: “Fuck your Couch” becomes that much better when you’re dealing with this family.

ETA: Couch is the stupidest fucking last name of all time

Counterpoint: American cheese makes the BEST grilled cheese, and you are wrong!

My friend got married a few months ago. She asked what her hashtag should be for her (C name) and fiancé (also c name). BOOM. #C&CWeddingFactory. Sadly, she declined.

I can think of at least 2 ways it would work. Not that either would be spectacular for the participants but it would be possible.

This! We can’t save the world if the idiots who messed it up are still kicking/messing it up further.

Dear HRC: I keep thinking about that scene in The Abyss. You know the one where Ed Harris brings Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio back to life and, between bouts of CPR, he yells, “Goddammit, you bitch! You never backed away from anything in your life! Now fight!”? And she comes roaring back to life?

“Bush doesn’t care about black people.” -Kanye West, 2005.