Hell, go to a gas station or something and ask for a pair.

There was a Burger King near our high school, and one day after school, one kid laughed so hard and so suddenly, he laughed a fry out his nose. Like, a thin half-inch piece.

Or a needle, apparently.

The Dodgers never beat the Giants last week.

Let’s pump the brakes before we start comparing anyone in this story to John Rocker.

I can't wait until the A's finally get their shit together and build a new stadium in Oakland- largely because I think that's just good for baseball, the city of Oakland, and long-suffering A's fans who really do deserve better.

So effectively, Iowans are blacked out of watching any of the six "local" teams that baseball's broadcast territory system is designed to make available to them.

It's the status quo, and the Giants are rolling in money.

Yeah, that should keep Larry Baer up at night.

I don't think it's that simple, as Brandon Belt showed us all.

Yes. In like, every way.

It really does.

Said bosses will probably also be out sick. In San Francisco in 2010, there was a lot of understanding.

Congrats to Zaza Pachulia on hosting SNL!

DAMN YOU KANE SOFTWARE

True. When's the last time any of us posted a comment on a post about Jeopardy?

Deadspin is just a blogger… he probably just sits in his mother's basement staring at his poster of Barry Bonds!