Somewhere in alabama roy moore both messed his pants AND declared this video some sort of commie, illegal immigrant witchcraft.

Maybe don’t get blown out by Iowa for one of your two losses next time?

And there it is. I’m somewhat surprised no one else has brought up the business reason behind the timing.

Maybe they hired him because of the Staph he would bring with?

He deserves a second chance guys. NFL is known for giving second chances, think of Michael Vick, Adrian Peterson, Colin Kae...::checks earpiece:: ...Ezekiel Elliott...

Yes, inserting a cigar into consenting woman’s vagina is much, much better than grabbing a non-consenting woman’s crotch. So much so that I wonder why you would even compare the two unless you yourself are some kind of lurking sexual predator.

“Yes, things sure have changed a lot since I used to check out jeans at the County Seat.” - Roy Moore

The weird thing is that they believe they are owed an explanation for why they can’t use it. That is the whitest part of the entire equation.

Basically, white people not being able to use the n word is a tiny peek into the world of black people, who are constantly seeing places they can’t go and things they can’t do.

Nah. Just train yourself to say “nibble” or “nugget.”

*Grabs popcorn to watch owners implode*

This is the purest desire I’ve ever felt in my life to see both sides lose.

I want to see them lose their home because they go bankrupt from medical bills. It’s time to make trump voters pay. Fuck those racist pieces of shit.

The story’s author takes us into the living room of Johnstown resident Pam Schilling, a 60-year-old retiree who is already keyed up to vote for Trump in 2020:

Based on the way Eli’s tenure with the Giants has gone, we can only conclude that next year the Giants will go 9-7 to get the wild card, and then Eli will throw 15 TDs to 0 INTs en route to another Super Bowl victory and MVP award.

I just saw the Full Frontal episode where Sam features a whole segment on Closing the Boyfriend Loophole... savage. And depressing.

Can we talk about the fact that Ben McAdoo looks like someone whose hard drive is going to be walked out of his home by the FBI at some point in his life?

I would skate through a brick wall for that coach.

Yeah, I don’t think you can call an economic boom a victory if you’ve had to alienate and stigmatise half your country’s minorities in order to achieve it.

I hope this article is satirical, cause it’s blistering hot garbage.