Hurry, CantSleep’s trapped on the escalator at the mall!

Yo, absolutely people want to destroy you because of the power you hold. You’re a rich male who thinks you can have the power to get away with sexual assault.

You sweet summer child. 

As a sidenote, that gratitude over the 11 days worth of hard work is so passive-aggressive that it is awesome.

A) Good

NFL: here is a bajillion dollars. All you have to do is not be a despicable moron for few years, we good?

Dan Crenshaw + global warming =

What idiot called it Jalen wanting to leave the Jaguars and not Ramsey Boltin’?

the Yankees said he’d play a role dis year, so he did

He will never get the no hit her that most pitchers strive for.

“Actually, I do not recommend she stand by Germán.”
-Tammy Wynette

I’m giving you a star not for the quality of the joke, but for how long of a road you walked to get there.

Not only that but many drivers user multiple apps at the same time, take jobs from whichever app is paying the most at the time.

But they aren’t employees at all, are they? They are people that use the app to make money. If I sell crap on eBay to make money, am I an eBay employee?

The Paterno/McQueary conversation as it plays out in the fevered imaginations of Gladwell, Jenkins, et al:

Simmons: Right.

In Gladwell’s defense, the Penn State coaching staff and administration probably spent more than 10,000 hours raping children and ignoring it, so he’d have to reject the entire premise of one of his own books if he didn’t recognize their expertise in the field.

Nail on head. My wife’s dad was a lifelong Ford employee and union guy (who took a retirement package at age fucking 50 in 2006, before the bottom dropped out). Huge Trump guy. Loves him. Says he’s got “brains and balls.” Love love love. He’s gonna fix everything! Everyone else is just a moocher who “didn’t work as…

Farms, corporations, and banks have always been the true welfare queens.