Re: the war memorabilia ...

All I know is that I had them release and snap me in the nuts about 354123 times. Anyway, here’s a picture.

What in the ever-loving depths of Oprah Winfrey-infested hell is a BEDROOM TOWEL?

(Other than that particular bit of insanity, you make sense. I do the hand squeegee thing and try to dry off as much as possible before ever stepping foot out of the shower stall.)

Requires multiple stars.

I like it! And the hipsters will hate it, and thus stay away.

I remember that episode of Growing Pains!

So should we call it something else? Like ...Superman is “super” because he’s frickin’ bigger and better than everyone by a huge margin.

Should it be a “nominally bigger moon”?

Wait, I thought the supermoon was 14% larger, not 0.44%.

Also, what’s the impact of the supermoon supereclipocalypse?

I live just north of Chicago, but I originally hail from Cleveland. I’m facing a situation that’s exceedingly rare ...I’m LESS embarrassed to wear my Cleveland Browns shirt than I am to wear any of my Bears attire.

(I usually split the difference and rep Northwestern Wildcats (4-0, 0-0) on the weekends.)

Current trade rumors: Bears looking to acquire a jar of Vlasics for their expired Clausen. Would prefer kosher dill for hot dog purposes, but will consider relish (neon green, also for hot dogs). Bread and butter strictly exempt.

The friendship canoe trip did not end well for Ned “Purty Mouth” Beatty, Ronnie “Dick Jones” Cox, and Angelina Jolie’s on-again/off-again dad.

Burt Reynolds pulled through well enough to become a running gag on Archer, however.

You’ve got to declare bankruptcy like five or six times before they take you seriously as the man who would be perfect as CEO of America.

I have a pair of jumps under my belt. The first actually went smoother than the second (yay for uncontrolled flat spins!) and the first was by far the more memorable ...

The USC football program was in disarray. They’d lost most of their coaching staff illness and looked to be on the verge of having to forfeit their remaining games. The players had lost their collective will to play.

That is, until one unlikely fan stepped up.

A fan with an insane passion for the game. A fan with an…

So wrong and yet so right. Well, like 80% right. Maybe 75% - it’s hard to tell with that camera angle.

Brian the sammich guy:

1) Go out to lunch.
2) Eat burrito.
3) Bring lunch home.
4) “Man, I was SOOO busy at work today, I didn’t even get a chance to stop and eat. I’m exhausted AND starving.”
5) Eat lunch for dinner.

I was 18. I’d been in college for four months. I’d known this group of mentally incompetent geniuses (we went to the Harvard of the Midwest, but common sense was lacking) for four months. My parents had owned that Dodge Caravan (new in 1987) for 8+ years.

Out of morbid curiosity, why is the screencap at the top of the article NOT from the game in which this actual play occurred? I don’t know that I really and honestly care, I’m just genuinely curious. The shot of Bautista missing the ball and throwing both hands up in the air would have made a perfectly usable image.

Very much aware of that. Alice in Chains, Blind Melon, Nirvana ...I was well into my teens/twenties and was watching grunge/alt rockers OD and stroke out an an alarming rate.

Sounds more fun that the bee outfit!