This thread is bumming me the FUCK out.

JURNEEEEEE. Also not gonna lie, as an old, the first thing that came to mind when I saw yr hed was this:

A-hem. Allow me to translate via another incomprehensible Muppet:

HOW DERE YOOO C.A. PINKHEM!!! I DID NOT SLEFE EVEY FOR YEERS UNDOOR DE DOOTIFOOL IYES OOF THE BEST CHEFS IN STOCKHOOLM FOR SOME TOMETO-HETING GOOBER TO INSOOLT MY CREFT!!! IV I SEE YOO OON DE STREET I VILL DOOMP A POT OOF MEETBELLS END LIGONBERRY OON YOOOR POONTY HEED!!!

OOND DE NATS SOOK!!!

I never watched Party of Five...but I loved him in Go!

I forgot that I did this. Except that evenness did not apply to putting on shoes. It had to go right sock, left sock, right shoe, left shoe. Even today when I am not as compulsive, I still always put on the right one first. It's like my one remaining thing.

Did you practice saying "moose and squirrel"?

I had something like this! It was when we were walking on tiled floors, because some rows end on a full square and some end on an off-cut. You DID NOT step on the off-cut rows, because it was uneven and felt bad.

Me too!

That is awesome!

i grew up a middle child in a family with dogs and with parents who didn't necessarily give me all the talks a parent should have with their child. i also read obsessively (side story, i got grounded from lightbulbs at the age of 7 because i would stay up all night reading and wake up super grouchy. THE NERDIEST) and…

My teachers would look at my parents with great sympathy at every parent/teacher night. My mother tells the story of how a teacher once said to her, "OH! You're Sybann's mother - let me tell you..."

Favorite toilet-time activity, age 5: wetting toilet paper wads, throwing it up onto our terrible popcorn ceiling. THEY ALL STUCK. I think my parents caught on about 6 months in to this endeavor, when the ceilings were a good 6" lower in the bathroom than they were anywhere else in the house.

When I was in second grade, I got in trouble for writing an essay declaring that I wanted to be a bond girl when I grew up. I thought it was a fabulous career choice because they wore pretty clothes , drove nice cars and got to smooch Bond. Unfortunately, the nuns and faculty at my Catholic school didn't agree and…

Oh, I have a few...cause as I kid I was a bit of an asshole.

I was not the cute kid. My sister was. We have SO MUCH dirt on her. She really was very inventive and adorable.

In around 3rd grade, I was super covetous of my classmates' colorful and ortho-perfect braces and retainers...so I fashioned my own, out of paperclips. I would keep them in my mouth all day (except at lunch, when I would pointedly put it on my tray) and pretend I was similarly braced. Later, when I realized I…

I have a picture of me as a child, in my grandmother's house... looking very serious, holding a doll, with a fold up tv tray looped over my arms. There is also a picture of me with a big bright smile looking back over my shoulder whilst wearing my dad's trenchcoat and soft me sized doll tucked into the neck behind…

This is terrible but I was 4. My mother was pregnant with my brother and the hospital had these classes for kids that were about to become older siblings. We got to put on scrubs and go to the nursery, etc. Well, we proceed to visit the new babies and the nurse holds one of the babies up to the window for us to see…

I was 8 years old when I went into my parent's bedroom one morning while my parents were still asleep and saw my Dad had a boner. I totally freaked out, woke my Mom up by dragging her out of the bed, and called 911 because I thought it was a chestburster from Aliens.