“Had Joe Flacco not tossed two dumb interceptions...”

You’ve created a monster, Samer. MY BLOODLUST FOR SHITTY TABLES MUST BE SATED!!

“Cubs Feeling Shafted, Failing to Touch Balls.”

Are we entirely sure Wade Phillips could move all of his extremities before this?

I don’t like Brady either, but name-calling just seems childish.

Some day, we’ll all get tired of laughing at the Browns. Today is not that day.

That take is turrible. Juss turrible.

Kotwika’s probation officer declined to comment on the integrity of the sample.

LOLNiners

“I know there are effects from these kinds of hits, like short term memory loss, but it could be worse. For example, at least I don’t have short term memory loss.” -Brian Jones

A Deadspin article that doesn’t shit all over law enforcement? It’s like a unicorn or an NFL spouse who doesn’t experience domestic violence!

At any point while Lacy is out of major public view, his weight is uncertain. He’s both fat and not fat. Schrodinger’s Fat, if you will.

What’s the Rougned Odor equivalent of the Bat Signal and how do I activate it?

Breaking news: Austin Matthews has been traded to the Boston Bruins for a 7th round pick and a bucket of pucks.

Based on the success and popularity of The Undertaker, people should be all about a guy who keeps coming back from the dead.

Toronto fans are just bitter that Baltimore has the better hockey team. What’s that? Baltimore doesn’t have a... nope, still right.

The deeper the V, the deeper the rage.

Most of the time, I’m indifferent to the suffering of a fan base, but between the Dolphins, Chris Bosh being forced to retire, José Fernandez and the Marlins ownership in general, I feel legitimately sorry for Miami sports fans.

I don’t believe this story for a second, everyone knows Canadians don’t beef with anyone.