Is there somewhere we can read these testimony transcripts in full? I’d like to print one out and mail one to Larry Nassar every goddamn day for the rest of his miserable shitstain of a life.

“Wait, we can swear?” - the previous 157 victims

Hopefully all of it.

So ah, Capela is singing this tune without accompaniment?

You’re right, we should definitely turn our attention to the bounce pass.

Two or three bowls.

Depends how raw the water is.

How much water must one drink to heal a fracture?

Just reading the ESPN article today, on top of your excellent coverage throughout, has me looking to a dog (or dog GIFs) to feel better.

“Victim 125.”

I’ll buy that he might be 6'3", but there’s no way he’s under 270. I’m 4 inches shorter and supposedly 30 lbs heavier, and I don’t look as blown out and flabby as the president, and I’m flabby as fuck! You put that fucker on a scale on national TV and maybe I’ll believe it.

A good thing to see after reading/hearing all of these brave, gruesome statements:

This was a bad date. She had a horrible date with a clueless guy who thought he was being sexy and hot. She was made to feel uncomfortable, and it wasn’t right.

The story reads to me like a groupie dissatisfied she was treated like a groupie.

Exactly. He goes and fucks up Pulisic too, and he goes straight to the top of the Armenian-American soccer fan shit-list. Please believe the eight of us can make your life miserable.

Pictured: Drake’s new tattoos for 2018

This picture looks like Incognito is forcing Sir Patrick Stewart to give him a blowjob.

RIP Derby. We will miss your wisdom, good boy.

You guys, I’m starting to think that maybe Tom isn’t very smart.