Way to keep your (pink) eye on the ball, Bob.

No matter how he tried, Torre couldn't convince Cory Lidle that the cockpit wasn't his home.

For Christ's sake, his nickname wasn't Captain Comeback After a Trip to the Goddamn Bathroom.

I'm a lifelong Cubs fan. Believe me, the vast majority of us know Big Hurt was a top three hitter of his generation and among the top 10 RH hitters of all time.

"This stupid-ass G.O.A.T. is so fucking dumb."

"That's nothing. Whenever the Clippers leave town, I set myself on fire."

If there was ever a way to reach Cleveland residents, it's through a publication that has experienced a similar decline into absolute disrepair.

It sucks the one thing that kept us from the World Cup was our coach's answer in a press conference.

Piping hot take.

"Dick eating won't help the situation."

Talk about a busted load.

Shit-eating actually give you pink eye? Fuck...

Just thinking about you figuratively walking away from the TV is mind blowing.

I prefer the Irish version, complete with a push down a flight of stairs.

The guy's just trying to dispel that stereotype about all blacks.

By this point, isn't the Snyder kiddie porn thing just assumed?

... and jerking off into socks by night...

"Since when does a Colt have to ask permission to shove something up his nose?"

Superman is no match for the Man of Steel Reserve.

The heat might help considering most of Blatter's mistakes lead to excessive moisture.