a beefy and ebullient rookie who mashes jumbo taters;

the best hitter in the game

I mean, it literally happened at a Lions game

I EATASS 69 is simultaneously the best and worst custom jersey of all time.

I think 33 becomes older when you remember that it’s 28 years older than most of his hair.

FIFY

Giv’r

Goddammit. Bo’s flowing locks get me every time. Bryce Harper’s time is done, Bo Bichette has the best hair in baseball.

“He’s a heel, motherfucker!”

The real reason the can’t put grass in the stadium is that there’s a secret lab under the OF where they are working on cloning hall of famers.

This is the best part of the joke.

God, after 7 in a row, it’d be really nice to see someone else take the Bundesliga title.

Honestly, I’m totally fine with everything they did in July with one exception. Despite the rather low opinion I have on Cal Stevenson as a prospect (and the industry generally agrees), I don’t understand how it was necessary to throw him in as a sweetener to get Fisher after already trading 3+ seasons of a decent…

Whelp, looks like we have the main event for SummerSlam next year, provided Ronda has a baby before then.

I don't really want to get into this, but it's only 7-8 years of guys who've proved they can. The rest is Cal Stevenson, who's ceiling is "4th OF/pinch runner" and floor is "org filler".

Guy, that's part of the joke. C'mon.

Toronto Blue Jays GM Ross Atkins stood in front of the assembled press and boasted that his team had “turned 14 years of control into 42 years of control,”

It’s not about price because Genny is cheaper and better

This day has been a banner day for appropriate Simpsons gifs in the comments.

The ironic syngery of “greenvegan2011" yelling about “FAKE NEWS” is just . . .