“Derrick you need to stop getting hurt”

Because there is almost no financial future involved. Men can go pro, here or abroad, and make boatloads of money, so there is a (small but present) incentive to go to a worse program where you’ll get more playing time/exposure in hopes of upping your game and potentially getting paid. For a lady-baller, the WNBA…

Given the Guy Cihi voice acting fiasco for the Silent Hill HD Collection this is the least surprising thing ever.

Eh, this is just locker room talk

Sort of off-topic but I had never heard Brook Lopez speak before. That man makes Barry White sound like Richard Simmons

“Is that a lot?”

George Foremane, George Forman, George Foreman, George Foreman, George Foreman, and Zayne

I’d like to take this moment to lobby for Dougal Spork. I have no idea why but I can’t stop laughing when I read that name. I think it’s the combination of traditional Irish with bullshit American. Like Ardal Staycation or Dermot Marshmallow Fluff.

“It is not medically necessary to be checked constantly. Nurses and doctors do it to make sure their birthing process is on their schedule - not necessarily yours.”

Insert obligatory “Damn, Betsy DeVos works quick!” comment here

As an avid reader of the “What Did We Get Stuck in our Rectums This Year?” Deadspin Year In Review, this pleases me

Two words:

Don’t shit where you eat

So in college I had the bright idea to drink an entire bottle of rum at a party. I’m a large man but clearly no large enough because I passed out in a recliner in the middle of the living room while people were still partying (not smart). As I lost consciousness, I let loose what can only be described as the most…

Fuck Konami

@Konami

And condoms are just chemicals you put on your penis to mess up your body’s normal STD-acquiring process!

You get to punch Ted Cruz in the back of the head and you’re asking for additional compensation? How greedy can you get?

Well, there’s that officer’s cardio for the day. He earned his Au Bon Pain this time.

“What’s the big deal?”