Like, not saying I don’t hate getting those but there is also the visceral satisfaction I get from popping one of them that always makes me really pleased when I do it... It’s disgusting, but still. :s

I love your passion for this!

Well this was gross and semi-impressive too. When I gave birth to my first I had to be induced. My labor wasn’t progressing like they wanted so the Dr came in to break my water. She told me that I might feel a little trickle and then there was an audible pop and my water sprayed out a good three feet from my body. The…

My entire body just flinched.

I was taking a shower and washing my butt, as you do, and pulled on something. Kept pulling. Started freaking the fuck out. Threw whatever it was against the wall and kept freaking out. Thought for sure I had some sort of intestinal worm. It was a rice noodle. That I pulled out of my butt.

As disgusting as this sounds I wish I could’ve smelled it.

Yeah, giving birth was pretty gross experience overall. Also, no one really sufficiently warned me just how gross the bleeding for weeks after birth would be. I had these INCHES, almost a FOOT long, stringy, gluey clots coming out of me for almost a MONTH.

JESUS CHRIST

After the fourth day of my period, I smell like a dead rat down there. Like a rat that’s been dead for a few days.

My first period after Nuvaring I noticed something dangling from my vag. Naturally I pulled on it. Out came what I assume was a chunk of the lining of my uterus.

Filed to: Becky

You can’t gross us out “Barry”, not after what we’ve all been through.

has anyone ever had food poisoning without shitting themselves? i feel like it is the mark of whether or not it is in fact food poisoning

I feel like I can’t compete with the writer’s story, but for me it was a period/virus combo. I had clots the size of guinea pigs dropping out of my vagina as I sat shaking on the toilet shitting my brains out while throwing up into a trashcan.

Given birth.

Barry, Barry, Barry, The horrors the female body is capable of know no bounds. This is going to be a shit show of epic proportions. I still have nightmares after reading the thing about the sunflower seeds on Jezebel. Us dudes just can't keep up with them. No Funbag poop stories have ever come close.

A lot of people will tell you that the color guard is a collection of kind of sad young ladies who contribute nothing to the band or the team.

No. That movie is a load of shit.

Hopefully this:

Wipe while sitting down? How the fuck do you wipe while sitting down? You mean crouching? I think this whole thing is based off of how people interpret the phrase “sitting down.” If you were actually still sitting on the rim of the toilet it’s impossible to get into dat ass to wipe. I selected “while standing up” but…