Wait. Women can be drag queens??!??!!!!!

I loathe all cartoons. Even as a kid, I refused to watch them. They were all childish and beneath me (yes, I do roll my eyes at the memory of my childhood). And then -

Whoa. Your reactions to my post were entirely unexpected and so highly appreciated. Thank you, Jez community for your outpouring of support just when I needed a crutch. I adore you all.

Thank you, friend. Your reassuring words mean the absolute world to me. xoxo

Thank you. ❤️ *virtual heart-shaped box of chocolate orgasms* ❤️

*sends virtual box of chocolate orgasms*

👍🏿❤

*sends virtual box of chocolate orgasms*

*sends virtual box of chocolate orgasms*

Thanks, deer. Obviously, it’s all going to be okay no matter what. I’m just having a temporary rage burst and was very happy to take it out on fake mike pence. I hope he gets a box of chocolate sharts today. I hope YOU get a box of chocolate orgasms.

Here’s what I have to say to you (Mike Pence):

Do you have cameras in my bedroom?

And guess who lost?

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

I really never expected that I would feel this grateful for my dairy allergy.

“In these situations we really don’t know when that baby is going to come.”

I’d like to add to the conspiracy: He’s got hella fly style.

Well thank goodness that was 100% of my diet while I was pregnant / nursing. I’d been worried I was poisoning my daughter with a life-long debilitating disease like diabetes or a life-threatening peanut allergy. But now that I know she’s not likely to bed women, thanks to my snack of choice, I feel so much better…

Clearly.

Aw. Well now that’s made my day better!