Maybe the reason there hasn’t been a mutiny at the FBI is that there is nothing to mutiny about, despite what an old, smelly potato* says?

If he didn’t have a gun, obviously he would have unleashed ebola virus on the country. We’d all be dead now. Thank the Lord, baby Jesus, for guns. Can I get an amen?

Honestly, you should be shooting everyone you see anytime you step foot outside of your home. They could have a gun. If you wait around, they will probably shoot you first, thinking that you have a gun (side note, you should always have a gun). I just saved your life. You’re welcome.

The Democrats haven’t figured out and elucidated every possible detail. When they do that, I’ll think of another reason to oppose what they come up with. But until then, you have to stop being mean to me. Those are the rules. Wait, you think I should do something to make the country a safer place? What are you, high?…

Listen to the whole thing, or go to 1:50 to hear what a “hero” is:

Haha, I actually am of the mind that there is no difference between a polished and unpolished turd (I think that is what the phrase is supposed to mean, that the thing is not actually different at all), but to be fair I have never seen a literally polished turd.

Trump talking about what other people don’t understand??? Trump doesn’t understand that his farts smell like death because he eats five Big Macs a day. Why is he telling anyone anything about not understanding something?

They’ve already rejected in once. This is a polished up turd, so it seems likely they’ll simply reject it again.

They did. It was pretty much the same as the old map.

Yeah, I kind of got there at the end of my stream of consciousness rant.

This was great, but I had mixed feelings. It seems to impugn cats, and cats are awesome. It also seems to impugn cocktail wieners, which are also awesome. But I guess it is okay, because while those things are both awesome, a cocktail wiener from under the couch covered in cat hair is decidedly not awesome.

He wouldn’t be the first person that wanted his in-laws to live farther away.

Not going to respond to the fucktard greys, but...

Republicans are doing a masterful job of confirming that, yes, they are the party that doesn’t give a wet fart about innocent, dead children.

Does this brain-dead dipshit not know that marches of this sort are always symbolic? Like, does this inchworm think that normally when crowds of protesters march to the Capitol, members of Congress come out of the building to address their concerns?

Have they confirmed yet whether he received permission from the mother?

People with a lot of time on their hands should sign up for this, set up dates, and then just not show up.

Don Jr. knows the only way he can get his father’s love is by being an unrepentant cunt. He’s not half bad at it.

My cousin’s co-worker’s uncle’s golf buddy heard that someone was cheating the system, so we should just get rid of the whole thing.

Does Brooks really think the NRA and their gun-totting supporters are actually a thoughtful, earnest bunch? That they are not just angry, scared, small people? Let these guys lead the way? Give me a fucking break.