If you add a ham sandwich to a promise from the turtle, you have yourself an underwhelming lunch and nothing else.

The thing that makes caving this time especially bad is that you know they will cave next time, too.

The Dreamers have broad appeal, so the GOP has to bring out the knives to chop them down. Politics requires that sometime you just have to malign a group of children who no sane person could claim did anything wrong. What’s the problem with that?

The $150 billion is what the CBO came up with. Some others were more brutal. This is the net cost, according to the most reliable and nonpartisan source. Nothing other than bullshit pulled from the asses of Mitch McConnell and Co. actually claimed that this would cut the deficit rather than grow it. And even many of…

No they won’t. They’ll talk about doing that. But they won’t actually do that. I mean, most of them would if they could waive a wand and do it and no one would blame them. But they don’t actually have the courage of their conviction.

Seriously, once we get done talking about this, can we talk about how Woody Allen can’t ever be bothered to cast a brother for a role?

And for the birdturd that I will not bring out of the greys, they could do all of this without slashing into medicaid/medicare and/or social security.* So even more betterest, you fucking prick!

“We are going to start winning again” went from “getting high paying jobs for high school drop outs” to “one-time $500 bonuses for mostly college graduates.”

The tax bill is going to cost tax payers over $150 billion per year. They could have just paid every adult in America $500 (every year), done way more for the economy (yearly stimulus, forever!), AND saved money.

Wonder where these turds think the border with Cuba is?

Settle down, Flo.

34 total deaths? So what you’re really saying is the boogeyman should be white guys that didn’t get enough hugs from their mothers (like the Las Vegas guy).

And the other people Libby asked are all idiots, especially HamNo. His answer is worse than what Trump does.

Why would you need a tunnel? Couldn’t you just send someone over there above ground?

I’d get one of those nacho trains like they have in that Progressive Auto Insurance commercial.

People named Cotton have a long history of not being able to take criticism:

I think it is okay when someone says something that channels Uncle Rico from Napoleon Dynamite to not treat it seriously and take some liberties in making fun of him. It is no more believable that he was the best high school baseball player in the NYC area as a high schooler than that he could throw a football over…

We can’t have Gun Control because there are already too many guns. So how exactly are we going to have Porn Control?

It’s not going to be Los Angeles. You don’t build a second headquarters on the west coast when your first headquarters is on the west coast. Amazon is already missing out on many of smartest people (obviously, people who live in the northeast are the smartest) because they don’t want to move across the country.