*Les Moonves stares teary-eyed into a mirror, repeating to himself, "The way of the future . . . the way of the future."*

Jesus, I remember that. You could feel Trebek seething through the television.

What bothers me the most about this movie is the stunningly inaccurate geography on the poster. This takes place on the Lower East Side, but is also apparently in the shadow of the Empire State Building? Fuck you.

I'm just happy that so many directors these days are shamelessly flying their Carpenter flag. When it comes to emulating someone else's style/tone, you could do a lot worse.

One more and he ceases to exist!

To be fair, Latveria State probably granted him an honorary doctorate under penalty of death.

This is so great. Jeopardy! clue writer has always been one of my dream jobs.

Eh, I wouldn't feel too bad about it. Miles Teller has a long career ahead of him and Simmons really, really deserved the praise.

I was so ready to hate that movie based on the trailer/premise, but both he and Shailene Woodley were fantastic.

He could conceivably bobsled his way to the store.

It's baffling to me that people could be this fucking stupid, but then, these are probably the same idiots who traipsed through a real cemetery to hold a funeral for a fictional character.

Is a knuckle sandwich not an option?

Chris Hardwick's post-show roundup suddenly became a literal circle jerk, as opposed to just a symbolic one.

At least they didn't get anybody else involved, like Interpol und Deutsche Bank, FBI und Scotland Yard.

To be fair, they also have Lizzy Caplan's everything.

Godspeed, Gayes!

I was also able to recognize a snippet of dialogue that Kate Bush samples at the beginning of "Hounds of Love," so that was pretty neat.

Have you seen The Battery? It's a fantastic zombie movie made for like 5 grand. I mentioned it here a few weeks ago, but it's absolutely worth checking out if you're trying to make a good low-budget movie.

Letting it ride until something embarrassing:

HORROR THREAD