This is amazing

Sorry but fan fiction—no matter how elaborate or well-written it may be—is not canon.

Well they're totally inappropriate for the occasion.

If we're talking shit named after Manhattan rappers, I think I'd prefer Big L. Rename 139 & Lenox the Danger Zone or something.

Clonking coconut sounds?

I wanted a laugh-track, and for my sins, they gave me one

Absolutely, though I would argue that pretty much every Tull song has an intricate arrangement (even those early, folkier records, like Stand Up) and is musically pretty complex, despite being ostensibly "radio-friendly." I also think lyrical content places the band squarely in the prog camp.

Really? How do you define prog then?

And here I was hoping that girls might be impressed with my knowledge of the Jethro Tull discography.

Wait, chicks don't like prog?

Are you 70 years old?

"Yeah, I once beat the crap out of this totally tough biker guy. It was in Canada over the summer, you wouldn't have heard about it."

"I'm gonna take you someplace where you can relax and forget all about gangsters."

I'm Close to the Edge of my patience here.

Downvoted for "amazeballs" but I support the sentiment

Lol "Fuel"

I'm fairly certain he has a guiding hand in the selection process and lobbies for or against certain acts.

The Sex Pistols were being generous when they called this "museum" a piss stain.

FUCK YOU JANN WENNER DOESN'T LIKE PROG

It materialized from the aether.