Unlike this seller, at least I did it the proper way...

...suddenly, all those ‘Bald Uncle Phil’ jokes on the Fresh Prince of Bel Air take on a new meaning...

Megyn Kelly is a perfect example of an irrelevant, racist, aging, crow-foot-ass hag that thought her blonde Caucasity would outstrip the fact that her check-engine light came on a long time ago...

My Xbox One Elite controller is plugged in via an 8‘ USB cable which works as it should and I couldn’t honestly care less...

Bruh, I’m a grown ass man tearing up over this. Reminds me of when I used to do my daughter’s hair. 

...maybe he’ll “commit suicide” the same way Jeffrey Epstein did. Either way, I’ll dance at his funeral...

“My bigger concern would be getting seen tapping the buttons in the app — we’ve got a new anti-texting, anti-cell-phone-holding law in my state that could be used in that situation, I think.”

...but there should be nothing stopping you from pulling over somewhere and updating... 

Police Logic:
They believe that an app designed to help you AVOID officers will actually put the officers in harm’s way...

Isn’t the point to know where they are so you DON’T encounter them? Or did I get that wrong?

‘Hot N*gga’ (Dallas P.D. Remix)

Dallas P.D tryna make a motherfuckin’ scene up in here, huh?
It’s fucking murda they wrote (Ah-ah-ahh)
How much money did they pay that dude to lie like dat?
(Nah-ah-ahh! Ah-ahh!)
Jahlil Beats, holla at me
Grr-r-r-r!

[Verse]
We know that Josh Brown was a hot nigga (Hot nigga)
testify ‘gainst…

Anyone miss the good old days when people had to, oh I don’t know, ACTUALLY learn how to properly operate a motor vehicle?

“To be fair, plenty of people died before your situation came to fruition.”

Funny...seems like he counted us as 3/5ths of a point...

Oh God - this (and the accompanying comments) is literally the best thing I’ve read all week!

I couldn’t have come up with a better analogy than this...

“She finally decided to post the video online on Monday and she was quickly contacted by someone in Delta’s corporate office who asked her to take down the Twitter video, which Arlene declined to do.”

...if THAT’S all it takes to get a response, I’m going to start recording everything - airlines, car dealerships,…

1) I just made a Facebook post about a Caucasian individual that I’ve known for 30 years (who happened to be a substitute teacher in Marion County, Florida), who recently commented on one of my posts that perhaps “they SHOULD bring back burning crosses and lynching Black men for looking at White women”, followed by…

Nope. Did you feel any movie you’ve ever seen that was based on a true story was pointless because you already knew how it was going to end?

...it’s only ignorant if it’s not true, and only inflammatory if you are a cage manufacturer...

1) If your aunt had a dick, she’d be a hermaphrodite. If she had stock in Uber, you’d be sucking it right now...

2) And I bet your extra ass never jaywalked EVER, right?

This is about to make me a Seahawks fan, just because Seattle is doing this...

Who am I kidding? I’m a Saints and Ravens fan, but I can respect Seattle for doing this!