You don’t even wanna know what he’s gonna do with those maracas.
IkeaMonkey
tinyhandpie
Maybe he can pull a Tyler Perry and play all the Kardashians? I would watch the shit out of that movie!
This image from Us Weekly makes it look like David Schwimmer is playing Kris. Can we start a petition to make this happen?
I had a woman request a new glass of ice water, because, and I can’t make this up, “her ice water was watered down.”
“you’ve never worked with the general public before.”
I’ve been working with General Public so long, he was just Lieutenant Public when I got started.
“How dare you mock the guy for not knowing what the beach is? Some people make it to age 50 without visiting the beach and somehow completely missing the ever-present representations of beaches in popular culture. Besides, many people suffer from Glorpman’s Syndrome, which is an inability to understand the…
My mom is a total badass. In the early 90s she filed a complaint against her employer for gender discrimination. She won and that’s why my very middle class parents have a beach house. Also, when my brother was diagnosed with dyslexia, his teacher very kindly tried to reassure my mother that a learning disability did…
My mom is a spitfire. She’s a tiny, fierce, mean, Irish lady. She had 6 kids in 6 1/2 years. I have a ton of great stories about her, like the time she bought a huge crystal chandelier at an estate sale several hours from our home. Lacking anything to wrap it in for the ride home, she stripped down to bra and panties,…
My mom is the mom that gets hella joy out of making me feel like a bad daughter.
So my mom died when I was 6 from cancer. At my kindergarten “graduation” I was getting a special citizenship award and was really excited about it. The evening of the ceremony, I remeber my mom laying on the couch obviously in a ton of pain. I, being 6, was oblivious and demanded she get ready for my graduation. She…
I was, too. What the hell was I thinking? I was 10, though.
Mine was 6th Grade. Thanks GOD my hair has never held curl for long.... and that crappy perm was a wave in time for picture day. Sadly.... the mullet was still there
Mine was an EIGHT grade perm. Should’ve known better, but alas.
If you’re as obsessed with not coming off as an old person as Madonna is, thinking a 7-year-old reference is topical and witty is probably not the best way to go about it. Maybe give two thumbs up and go “Is nice!” while you’re at it.