My blood hurts.

Hecks no! I got Bowser on the ropes!

That's legitimately heartbreaking :(

On a related note, I find the whole "daddy dom/little girl" lifestyle and ageplay in general to be suuuuuper weird. I can kind of understand being attracted to innocence and naivete, but when you start infantalizing someone and getting off on that, it just crosses a line. Also the slang that goes along with it (like…

Roleplay. I just can't do it. It's weird because I've taken improv and acting classes, am fairly good at public speaking, and I like dirty talk, but for whatever reason I just can't play pretend when I'm in the bedroom. Every time I've tried I can't get out of my head and I'm hyperaware of the unreality/absurdity of…

That's kinda disappointing. I didn't like the comic much, but I liked Ellie and Spot and I think they'd make fun additions to the cast. At the very least they'd be more engaging than Major and Liv's roommate.

It was worth it. *gets wheeled away on stretcher*

Out of all the many terrible New 52 redesigns, that one has to be one of the worst. Fucking knee windows, man. What the fuck.

What's the over/under on Peggy dying in Civil War? She looked ready to go in Winter Soldier, I imagine they have something planned with that before Chris Evans leaves the franchise. That would actually be pretty profound if handled well, severing one of Steve's final ties to the world he once knew as well as sending…

Because Steve/Nat is where it's at 💅

The biggest sin season 5 committed was dressing Alison Brie in sweaters, button-ups, and trousers almost every episode instead of her usual low cut tops and skirts. I don't give a shit that it was a conscious decision to portray character growth through wardrobe choice! Fuck artistic license and appeal to my basest…

And Harris loved U2.

I have bronchitis and I laughed so hard at that I couldn't breathe for five minutes afterward. Harris was truly fucking fearless.

Are you seriously going through my comment history because I flagged you? For someone so above it all, you sure are a crabby fuck.

Just want to let you know I flagged all your comments. Go fuck yourself.

Probably my favorite P&R joke. Harris's Phone/Foam Corner bits and Farts and Pro are my go-tos for when I just want a big dumb laugh. This is so awful and I don't know how to process it.

No, butt stuff.

And a hole in the wall where the men can see it all

I won a round with Lifetime Presents: A Good Sniff: The Story of Daniel Radcliffe's Delicious Asshole

-Gates open, PA announces: "Welcome to Carl Sjunior's Hamburgers."
-Close up of concerned Bryce Dallas Howard: "Where's the thingy?"
-Cut to velociraptor, which is secretly a robot: "I don't eat meat."
-Chris Pratt enters room: "Creak. Slam. Sit."