Ump: Inside corner, strike three! You’re out!

Goldie Hawn has been getting papped a lot lately and I’m starting to wonder if she’s the one making the calls.

I’m not sure she knows who Riefenstahl is. My money is on Candice Cameron Bure.

Right? His followers are so invested in the macho man figure they think he cuts, but he’s just a sniveling little turd.

That simply would not fold adequately for the task at hand.

Her head is very large.

How come women can’t go sleeveless when Paul Ryan is allowed to go spineless?

Natalie Pasdar has filed for divorce

Kanye clearly wants Beyonce and has wanted her all this time. All she has to do is say the word, and he’ll drop whomever he’s with.

“When I saw that picture, it just made sense to me,” Jones said. “They say you can’t see the picture clearly if you [are] in it, but if I was outside this picture I would have seen the same thing.”

Okay but can we also talk about him getting a mandatory sentence of 19 years for stealing a cell phone? Like in what world is that a proportional punishment?

“I would never want to feel like I was playing a character that was offensive.”

As an Asian American woman, I’m glad I’m being represented in politics.

I feel that way too, about this movie and Requiem for a Dream. #thanksbutnothanks

What in God’s name is happening with Anna Kendrick’s bosom there?

The stereotype that white people always carry ranch dressing around with them is not cool anymore. When you say ‘He’s already got his, that white boy over there’” don’t just fucking assume I’m carrying my own ranch dressing around with me you hurtful monster. I need it for my tenders and when you assume that I already…

“Help me!”

Yeah, that’s a dangling participle. Which is illegal to show in public in at least eighteen states.