It's a shamarriage.

The creepy baby knows you think he's creepy. Don't make the creepy baby angry. A-ha-ha, A-HA.

Dream maker, indeed. My dream is to smell flowers at a very awkward angle. It looks like the first dress is the key to making that dream come true.

She actually lives in a light-less cave in the basement of Kleinfelds. She makes each gown lovingly, but completely in the dark, so she has no idea how hideous they are. When Randy summons her from the cave (this is how she is always available), she is actually seeing the gown for the first time. But she doesn't see…

I think it broke off of his hairpiece and just slid down there. See that confused look on his face? He's trying to figure out what part of his head now has a tiny bald spot.

It's possible that I initially read this as OMG, how are these "MAKE MONEY ON THE INTERNET,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,," people black!?!?

I was at a work conference at a fancy LA hotel a couple of years ago. I opened up my nightstand drawer and found these items. The glob of lube is my fave.

YES! Exactly. How do the same people produce such different outcomes? My one daughter can drive me nuts because we're so alike and the other one can drive me nuts because we're so different. I love them to pieces but sometimes I think they're just doing it to fuck with us.

I was about seven and spending the night at my best friend's house (who is still my bestie 35 years later). Her six year old sister was in the tub and just decided to poop in there to see what would happen. She admitted this later but at the time she insisted that the poop wasn't hers and had just come out of the…

I think I went to college with the same girl! The bizarre part is their steadfast insistence that what they're saying is true, even in the face of clear evidence to the contrary.

I saw that one on the news last night. It got past my magic shell outer coating and went right to my squishy center. I can't imagine.

Husband and I are sitting at a restaurant having breakfast. I am sitting on a bench that is shared by a couple other tables, husband is on the side with individual chairs. So, we're pretty close to the people sitting next to us. The couple to my left is a woman sitting on the bench part and her partner in the chair. I…

Tracy Chapman literally changed my life. I stumbled on her first album a little late, when I was in college, and the picture she painted with her lyrics just blew me away. It made me change my major to social work and I never looked back. I've spent the last 11 years working at an agency committed to social…

Me either! The song is so descriptive on its own but pairing it with the documentary really increased its impact. I loved their writing collaboration with the vastly under-appreciated Dan Wilson on that album.

I traveled to Mexico with my friend who was an emetophobe with motion sickness. We rode on crowded buses over bumpy roads and she was in a state of panic the whole time. But she was totally open with me about it so I could support her if needed. I was also impressed that she was willing to go on that trip while…

But...where do they go once they get sucked in?

I have what I lovingly refer to as my "trashcan of skin" (so named after a horrible Discovery Health Channel documentary) as a result of my two kids. I am tiny, they were huge, and I have bad Irish skin with subpar collagen. My abs also look like they are in a fight and don't want to be anywhere near each other. I…