Pictured: Magnifying glass and ants.

You know who would've loved this post? Gawker :(

Competing in the olympics or not, ending up passed out in the middle of the street covered in your own poo is a bad day.

I have the same gait when I have to poop.

Let’s all hope this is the beginning of a long and bitter rivalry between the city of Montreal and the entire state of Kansas.

“The reinstatement of your suspension is suspended pending suspension reinstatement.”

Worst Bears of 2016; Baylor.

You’re being chased by 100 cops, your life is over, you may be facing the electric chair. Maybe you just want a temporary respite from losing everything you ever had by listening to someone having an even worse day in John Fucking Starks go 2-18 from the floor.

I wonder what Stephen A. Smith thinks about this.

your pocketbook may say otherwise

I can confirm, I was at the Baylor medical center last night and there was no rape.

Or, if you’re into crossfit, you should run into oncoming traffic.

The “Vote Trump 2016!” bumper sticker on the snow machine was a dead giveaway.

“I didn’t see the dog murdered. I heard about it. I don’t like it. But my people are passionate and some of these dogs, look they’re bad dogs, and my followers are passionate. They’re passionate about America. And a lot of it, most of it, is a beautiful thing.”

I spray my comforter down with Lysol

I’m a grown man who sleeps with a fitted sheet and a comforter, no other sheet. What the hell good does the other sheet do besides stick to me when I try to roll over if I’m sweaty and make for another sheet to wash/put back on the bed?

Second place: Treadmills.

No, no... you misunderstand... her kids are white.

Coffee snobs are the crossfitters of the beverage world.