Jesus Christ, are you guys harvesting staffer parts for Drew in some sort of baroquely demented Thiel-esque body clinic? What the hell is even happening any more?

Saving my enthusiasm for the Fellate the Troops Bowl!

Please thank your father for his service for me! It’s people like him, who are the reason I don’t kneel for the anthem.

My daughter had a soccer game on Memorial Day weekend this year. And the league passed out stickers to all veterans and active military. My dad asked if first responders counted and then took a sticker for himself. My dad is a 66-year old engineer that weighs 400 pounds. When I asked him why he considered himself a…

Nice to see Jeremy Lin back in NY

And how tall are you?

I don’t want a team if it comes at the expense of another fanbase. I don’t wish that pain on anyone.

I’m doing this to demonstrate my leadership.

The Rapes Of Wrath - A novel by Ben Roethlisberger

Most problems are solved by having someone “in charge” weigh in with their lack of comprehension and galactically stupid ideas.

Hey, the guy’s not made of money and anyway he already owns a deluxe rotating tie rack and a Shake Weight.

it was a groupon deal he only spent like 3 grand

I don’t work for Jezebel, but YOU’RE HIRED!

Avril died in 2003

oh good lord... not a born again... those are the worst

“So tell me the news Doc. Is it bad?”

How could they tell the injury was affecting his throws? Were they starting to hit the intended targets?

Journalism pet peeve= “alleged victim.”

Well, he hasn’t violated #3, and he seems to REALLY care about #4.