“Now see, what you didn’t figure in this equations was, the doctor....was a woman.”
“Mr. O’Neal, I really just need you to pick your two side dishes and pull up to the window.”

The moment you realize that Pokemon have better healthcare than most people in America and its free.

Having two of the best teams in the league, both of which are stocked with young stars, play on a field that could very easily lead to any number of those young stars being seriously injured seems like a self-evidently bad idea.

Thank you. Seriously. For this piece and for being a great neighbor. 

How do we stop the Cowboys from being on primetime games?  Is there anything we can do?  Is there like a get out the vote thing we can throw at this problem?  

Weird that there are two other writers also named that.

I assume Saudi Arabi is paying for Cena to win an 18 on 1 match, just to show how dangerous one man can be.

Last night did not help support my “Devin Booker is butt” take but I will not be discouraged. 

He teammates seemed genuinely stoked for him too, which, while he’s a super magnetic dude generally, feels important. If they don’t view this as some bogus farce, that’s really all you need. 

the real victory was the friends they made along the way

The trial fucking enraged me. Kobe had his scumbag lawyer “accidentally” use the accuser’s full name in open court half a dozen times just to make sure it got out there so legions of unhinged fans would make her life a living hell until she gave up and went away. And it fucking worked. The judge threatened to hold her…

SWEET SWEET BEAUTIFUL JUSTICE!

But he loves missing TD’s. 

“the SEC is too liberal" is a hell of a take there Hugh 

He didn’t even linger on top of Foles for a second after making the tackle.  Not even enough time to kinda reach down and see if the rumors are true, not even just a little graze along the inner thigh, just to see, nothing weird, but just a brush with the back of the hand to see if you can feel something alive; like I…

My little sister moved up from Chicago to Milwaukee and actually just got engaged to a Packers fan. He is just about the nicest guy in the world and is more than an overprotective brother could hope for in a brother in-law. He bought her a Rodgers jersey for Christmas last year and I now plan on making a scene at…

Ben Zobrist and Nick Markakis articles in the same day? Good to see my 2009 fantasy baseball team having a strong showing on Deadspin today!

To each their own ... as long we are all in agreement that St. Louis pizza belongs in the trash can.

Look at whatever the hell this thing is Stewart is holding. You can practically smell the sewer rat milk that was used to make that cheese.