Like “DECAPITATION STORY BELOW, STOP NOW IF YOU LOVE CAPS.”

Not to be outdone (but still hopelessly cute):

I cried reading this.

Me to President Obama

How angry is Kanye right now?

That comes right after, “Women shouldn’t go to college anyway.”

lol what?

Women should also avoid spaces where men are likely to be present, because men may strike at any time, especially if provoked. A man who is about to strike will raise himself into an intimidating posture and then shake the rattle on his tail in order to warn away a woman who he sees as a potential target.

Liam Hemsworth.

i fuckin love this comment

No, implying that the dildo was on top of the pillow not underneath. Ted is the dildo in this statement.

I agree with you mostly, except for this tibdit of fun from Senator Giggles*:

There shouldn’t be a poll, because there is only one right answer.

What kind of savage doesn’t use a top sheet? Joanna, what other horrible secrets is your b/f hiding from you?

#1 is the MOST important question. If you’re taking a job, you need to know why the last person left. If it’s a simple “a better offer came along” type thing, fair enough. But if you hear things like “he was a jerk that didn’t fit our model”, or “we had issues with him”, it can give warnings of a toxic environment.

My wife and I opnce spent a friday evening sitting on opposite sides of the same couch texting each other emojis back and forth. She has an iPhone, while I have a Nexus 5. While she drank her wine, and I sipped my bourbon, we compared and contrasted all the differences, and she even rated which dog emojis were cuter…

This shooting happened less than a block from where Euric Cain’s gun jammed while he attempted to murder Tulane med school student Peter Gold last September. I also happen to live within a couple blocks of where both of these crimes were committed.

I eagerly await her YouTube attack ad against the fifth grade class.

27 is the WORST. You start worrying about aging AND shit gets real regarding keeping up with your friends as they embark on their adult lives: “Wait, what? Susie bought a house?? Oh god, should I be buying a house?” “Jane is pregnant? Should I start having babies? If I don’t will be be infertile when I want to?”…